Ahmad Hassan: So, what I was thinking what we could do -- is put this painting...
Ahmad Hassan: Right on the back wall over there? This would give the room some color and develop a sense of flow --
Saddam: Tell me you are not serious
Guy: Oh god, what now
Saddam: Here, let me check the book
Judge: What is that?
Saddam: Interior Decorating for Dictators
Saddam: Let me see, let me see, ch ch ch, oh here it is: "Whatever you do, never put that painting on the back wall over there -- because that would be ridiculous. It would not provide the room a sense of flow, and also it says that you are a big stupid jerk -- and to bring me a soda."
Judge: It DOES NOT say that.
Saddam: Let me check again -- No, it definitely says that. Listen, I am just telling you what the book says. Don't shoot the messenger.
Dead Former Messenger for Saddam Hussein: HELLO? IRONY HERE. Hello? Is this thing on? (tap, tap) Is anyone alive out there?
Saddam: Oh, and the book says orange soda.
Judge: That is not a decorating book, that is the Koran! We can all see that!
Saddam: Oh, no, it's one of those combo deals. Koran goes in the front, decorating tips in the back.
Judge: Oooh, I need to get one of those. I will add it to my Christmas list.
Saddam: Yeah, it's pretty sweet, I actually got it for Christmas last year myself. You should have seen the hole in the ground that I was living in before I got this book.
Jawad Adazi Jawad: Saddam is a LIAR! He is an insane horrible man! He is lying to all of you!
Jawad Adazi Jawad: ... Because that painting would just look absolutely perfect back there!
Saddam: Ok, hold on, back up -- you are giving *us* style tips wearing those giant 80's glasses, Sally Jesse?
Jawad Adazi Jawad: SHUT UP
Judge: Seriously though, check out these babies. Titanium.